20 Kg

Salam Alaikum..


  it really hurts when finally there are people who call you FAT. mean.

Never call a girl fat in front of her -Lily Aldrin, How I Met Your Mother.

i know i'm fat. but really thanks guys, you just made it clear to me. i am so fat. it's very hurtful. it's not like i cannot be thinner again. in fact, i weight only 18kg when i was 7. what was yours back then? a lot heavier i guess. you guys are just a bunch of mean guys who will end up dying alone. and don't even dream of me liking you in silence even a bit, boy, you are so totally wrong. you guys are too grows.

 i was thin when i'm young, so i don't think there's a problem if i wanted to lose weight, which i am doing right now.

i strictly weight myself everyday, just to remind me how heavy i am. i consume herbalife properly. and i exercise. my target? to lose up to 20 kg. i'm on my way, and i will prove it. and i mean it. 20 kg. You'll see it. i'm going to promise myself. 20 kg.

then i'll buy those pretty clothes which never fits me. damn fashion company. if i were to have one, i'll design for fat people too. what, like only skinny people live out there in the world? Hell no! and don't you dare think i'm going to be like those pretty girls who keep acting coy. i'm going to be myself no matter what. because i'm tired of guys. so rude and mean.

it's not like i'm being mad right now. i'm kinda happy i exercise just now. i mean, this semester is going to be so hard, i just knew it. just like what laila twitted;  Studio and projects havent started yet and im already placing myslef in distress.


again, i'm freaking out. i am freaking out. towards everything. this is as what we already should have known, the ujian from Allah, just to make us stronger.


Salam.